Yesterday it was announced that in New Zealand we have 1 more week in Level 4 Lockdown and then we go to Level 3.

We are going to be in this for some time. So this one is for you. Particularly if you have children at home.

Without challenges we cant rise above.
It’s all about perspective…. how we view things, how calm we can stay and how we respond during these crazy times. The better we can do this, the higher we can rise coming out of this.

These are unprecedented times. Everyone is facing different challenges and emotions are high. Some of us experiencing feelings we haven’t before.

Jacinda says we must BE KIND and she is spot on. Start with being kind to YOURSELF.

The feelings you feel today are totally valid. No one knows how to deal with these changes, but we all have the power to be kind ourselves. Find some positive, good WILL come from this and the sun will rise again tomorrow.

Keeping calm, kind and positive is most important, for you and your children. Our children feel our stress, tension, sadness and frustration. They also sense our joy, our calm, and our positivity.

Inner voice
I had a phone call from a friend, she was so sad, upset about all sorts of things. We talked about waking up our inner voice. Being aware of what it is saying and remembering to be kind to ourselves.
I quoted my favourite quote “let your inner voice be the kindest voice you know”.

I remind myself of this every day. No one can lift you up, feed your soul or give you motivation like you can. So give yourself that time. Because you are so worthy!

“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.”
– Christian D. Larson

There is no better time than now, to drop ALL parental expectation and worry of judgement, during this time. You do you! Focus on your family and what feels right for you right now.

Children at home
Children learn best through play, so, foster this. The more play the better. Preferably unadulterated play. The more children play without you, the deeper their learning.
Often when children play with adults, the adult adds their ‘truth’ (see my blog post), or what learning they think ‘should’ be happening. When actually, if we allow the child to lead the play and the adult plays the ‘follower’, children connect with their game/play and learn, on a deeper level.

Empowering our Young Children

Children will invite you to their play… offer you food from their kitchen, ask you to build blocks with them, want to make a hut. If we can play the ‘silent partner’ and allow them to take us in to their world, we are enabling deep learning to occur. Letting them lead the play fosters engrossed play. Which in turn, promotes play. The more they play the more you can do your work.

I believe whether you have 1, 3 or 5 children at home, the teaching should be the same. Promote unadulterated play. Encourage your child to play without you.
Yes a single child misses the ‘social’ part, but that’s when you come in, as a silent partner- be their friend but dont lead or guide the play.
This will happen in windows throughout the day, naturally allowing times for the child to also play alone.
Allow siblings to deal with their own issues. Enter their chaos with calm. Give then the expectation that they can sort it out, so in a calm manner, remind then “talk about it, work it out”.
You only need to step in if someone is going to get hurt.

If you are being the ‘entertainer’ then your child is going to want to be entertained or have entertainment all day long. Encourage your child to play in the garden, give them some resources, perhaps some blankets, sheets, books, cushions, rope, wood.
Lego/blocks, cards, puzzles.
Encourage them to play with their ‘toys’.
Then, have them you prepare food for the day.

Have your children support you doing ‘house’ stuff. Teaching them cooking, cleaning, washing, and for the older ones, perhaps how to change a tyre. Just living is learning.
If you need support in understanding the learning that occurs in different ‘house jobs’ I can elaborate…
Lets start with the washing – these are life lessons –

Sorting – what washing goes in each load? whose is whose clothes?
Matching socks (your 2 yr old can work on this) – this is early maths learning!

Hanging, folding – hand eye co ordination, motor skills.

Helping – team work, kindness, managing self

Conversation – language, social learning, listening, understanding, following instruction.

Baking – science, maths, language, life skills, managing self

Gardening – connection with nature, kindness, presence, care and nurturing, connection, the wider world.

There is a lot of great learning available online. However, I urge you to closely supervise online activity.

School work.. now that’s an interesting one. I personally believe if your child wants to do school work, that’s fine. The Ministry of Educationhave sent put some cool learning packs and there is ‘school stuff’ on He Papa Kainga – the Learning Hub TV2 9-3pm weekdays. BUT, if your child doesn’t want to, dont put ANY pressure on them or you to do so. They are already learning.

We need to lose the pressure, avoid social media if this makes you feel negatively – anxious, not good enough, different, etc.

“Lighten up on yourself. No one is perfect. Gently accept your humanness”
– Deborah Day

Hot Tip
Start the day with movement and nature. Exercise – walk, bike ride, work out and GET OUTSIDE.

Implement routine and introduce some positive rituals.
Paul and I every day at dinner talk about what we are grateful for each day. A small ritual like this fosters reflection, positivity and communication. We must take time to find gratitude in our world.

Write down things you ‘miss’ and want to do when this isolation period is lifted. Put them in a jar and when all of this is over, get the jar and work through achieving these things.

“Start where you are,
Use what you have,
Do what you can. ”
– Arthur Ashe

Stay home
Stay clean
Stay calm
Stay kind

“Lets finish what we started”
– Jacinda Ardern